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my stagnant heart

in every girl's life there comes a time when she just needs to be inspired...
when being alone (but with friends) seems to be not enough anymore...
that every waking moment seemingly feels empty...


since february 2011 specifically valentines day...i broke it off with my last boyfriend...
i felt like shit that moment thinking by my self that i made a decision that forever will be a part of me...
and now my stagnant heart seems to be longing for an inspiration right now, that having a crush wouldn't let me surpass loneliness anymore... i know that it is not a need to have someone but it seems that my feelings have just gone astray with all the times when i see couples walking in the streets holding hands,
or when i see people kissing their partners, gosh i just felt so jealous yet longing those memories within my head's hard drive... and now i think I'm lost for words with how i am regretting my chances of being with a special person in my life...


kung nababasa mo ito, nais ko lang malaman mo na kahit di pa kita nakikilala
nagpapasalamat na ako... sapagkat tila isang parte ng aking puso ay nagsusumamo
sa piling mo...nasaan ka na ba? natatagalan na ako sa paghihintay sayo, ilang valentines day pa ba
ang papalampasin ko nang di kita kapiling, ilang sorbetes pa ba ang pagsasaulahan kong nagiisa ng wala ka...ilang gabi pa ba ang dapat kong hintayin bago kita makilala...minsan iniisip ko na di ka na darating, na mauubos nalang ang lamig ng softdrinks kong hawak habang hinihintay kang dumaan sa aking tapat...na patuloy parin akong titingala sa tanikala ng langit at mga bituin sa kakaisip na sa buhay kong ito darating din ang araw na may sasalo sa hamog ng gabi na isang tulad mo...kung nasan ka man sana'y masaya ka ngayon ngunit kung hindi naman lagi mo lang alalahanin na may isang katulad ko na walang sawa at walang humpay na maghihintay sayo.


N.
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