Banana Chips Love Story

the BOMB has been cast! my secret crush on Mr.G has now been spread like a deep dark secret overflowing in a river full of unwanted kind of plague..gosh it hurt knowing that another girl likes him the way i do, but no...she doesn't like him like the way i like like him... awhile ago i was listening to him talk in a lecture and i just stared at him blankly, his small pouted lips drew me into a deep trance as if it was speaking of a different kind of tongues...oh well..so after the break of the mini talk i was in, i secretly stared at his hands, gosh..i saw a sign...i say that in his left hand, he has a birth mark... (fyi i have a birth mark in my middle finger ---> right hand nmn) gosh i felt so happy yet i feel so unsure, unsure if it was a sign waiting to happen or something that would entitle me to be hurt...oh well...now that almost everybody knows that i like him..and the rumor is totally spreading like wild fire...now i feel so sad knowing that he won't appreciate wha...

in every girl's life there comes a time when she just needs to be inspired... when being alone (but with friends) seems to be not enough anymore... that every waking moment seemingly feels empty... since february 2011 specifically valentines day...i broke it off with my last boyfriend... i felt like shit that moment thinking by my self that i made a decision that forever will be a part of me... and now my stagnant heart seems to be longing for an inspiration right now, that having a crush wouldn't let me surpass loneliness anymore... i know that it is not a need to have someone but it seems that my feelings have just gone astray with all the times when i see couples walking in the streets holding hands, or when i see people kissing their partners, gosh i just felt so jealous yet longing those memories within my head's hard drive... and now i think I'm lost for words with how i am regretting my chances of being with a special person in my life... kung nababasa...

Get up for today: tight gym pants, purple no sweat v necks...just another boring outfit for the gym... Setting: coffee shop MOOD: lonely..just lonely.... Here i am weeping my ass off at an ordinary coffee shop at the mall, sipping a strange kind of caramel machiatto that the waitress with boy scout shorts concocted, just waiting... just waiting for someone i dont even know i exist...so first of all my name is_______.... just call me N a fresh college grad from a university where archers are ablaze..haha..so yeah i just graduated and now i am currently living the life of a gypsy, someone with plans but no plans kinda path type of girl... just to keep it simply...im BUM...just BUM. Firs of all i want to make a disclaimer... the title of my blog right now is "Banana chips love story" ...but it doesnt mean that all i am going to write is about my love story which is kinda a ZERO right now...my status have been kinda that shitty recently... right now im in between boys...or so ...

another sleepless night wasted by thinking about him... ..why is it so hard loving someone who don't even know you care, its like as if your wasting time to build a tower of bubbles that you know yourself that you don't have a chance to build one... if he only knew how i care about him and how i am very much willing to make him happy... if he only knew how i long for him to notice me, not as a younger sister but someone special... someone who will ask him how he is doing or someone who will make him realized that there is more to life than heartbreaks and loneliness, that at the end of the day there is someone like me who is willing to heal his stagnant heart... i hope you'll be able to read this one day....coz i want to say many things... i want you to know that i long for the day when ill be able to hold our hands, i long for the day that you will look upon me and comfort me during my tiring days and kiss me in the forehead with your cute tiny lips... i long fo...

Last week I've been too preoccupied enough with the global summit that the office I'm in ...are now organizing...though it has been one hell week of stress and busyness, i can only say one thing and that is i enjoyed it, not because i was very much helpful to the team but, its because i got close with Mr.G...yes i got close with my secret baby love crush...hahaha... i started getting to know him that well, and if it is really a feeling of me liking him or just a fore thought of being appreciative and admiring someone responsible, but that the end of the day i notice that what i feel is that i like him like him... right now it has a been a week or so of asking myself if i like him, for i just realized that this crush i have on him will just forever a "crush"... for at the end of the day i know that he won't be able to like me...why? 1.im way too young for him (which i really don't mind..) 2.im way too noisy/outgoing... 3.he treats me like a little sister :...