Skip to main content

UNLEARN: to my one and only orange juice


 UNLEARN


"now it has been a year since i broke up with you..and i know in my heart i still haven't move on…coz it hurts me that i must unlearn you..pretend that you were just a glimpse of me, that until now our memories have still been hunting me to sleep,  i haven't move on…the night i first saw you, did you know that i sprayed a bottle of my perfume on me and in my place so that you wont ever forget my scent…god only knows how much i hurt  when you never went back to me, i know its stupid of me to never let go of our memories, but until now i haven't found someone to replace of you in my heart, Now i understand why you flooded my playlist with moving on songs like “over it” but its all good…thank you very much for helping me transcend to be more than a girl but a woman..a woman for i never grew restless of the reality than in life…we fall in love…We enjoy the feeling..we hurt..break up…and say goodbye….and eventually..move on…
Now i deleted our memories as if it never happened… But you will forever remain in me for all my life… Though forever is not true. Maybe someday it'll be… Not with you.. But with someone else."


i wrote this excerpts when i was sitting in our buildings fire exit thinking about you when i accidentally saw a pint of rocky road ice cream and a box of OJs, you are my one and only orange juice lover, the guy that taught me on how to eat ice cream in the middle of the night while snuggling under covers because its ranging outside, you are the guy that always doesn't want to hold hands with me coz you find it so common..instead you just held your arms unto me and let me cling unto it..you are the guy who taught me on how to love recreational dates that always includes going to the arcade and wasting 500 bucks just to play zombie gun games with me, that always ends up me being killed, but you were there beside me feeling like a super hero saving me from all the assassin zombies in left for dead…you are the guy who always says thank you to me overtime you leave my pad, the guy who never fails to kiss me before i go to sleep, you are the guy who never fails to make laugh every time we make stupid funny phone calls overnight just for you and i to end up hearing each others snore while sleeping with our phones still on call..you are the guys that always go t shirt shopping with me and ends up buying the funniest double meaning ones…you are the guy that made me watch creepy yet boring films that even you cant understand just for us to have the excuse of cuddling up in bed while you hug me while sleeping and never fails to whisper me "concentrate and focus on the movie…"…you are the guy who introduced me to video games, to long nights of jam legend level up moments, of multiple nights of us not sleeping just for you to teach me how to play tennis in our psp directly connected in out lcd, oh how i miss you devil-ish smile, your small kisses that never fails me to be amuse, i miss your sensitive gums and how you always tell me to be gentle while brushing my own teeth… i could go on all day describing how much i am thankful to you…for you taught me how to be me..for you never gave closure, we loved each other while it was worthwhile but it seems that destiny never really placed you unto my arms..and maybe you were really not meant for me.

i loved you…and i will always do.
you'll forever be my one and only orange juice.

And now ill just forgot you as if u never happened…

(the author is merely ranting her feelings about her first ex-boyfriend who she doesn't have any closure with)

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Unsaid Thoughts

This is past few months has been quite challenging for me, my personal life is infact, a whirlwind in the literal sense, there's the moments of me almost giving up my job, for i dont feel very much compensated, i mean, dont get me wrong, i love the job i am in, it doesnt pay well but the experiences and the fact that though i am young, and i am able to handle different projects (several in fact) that young ones cannot chance upon, i love my job, the people i work with and my ever resilient, very powerful woman boss that i have. But as a millenial, there are moments when you even think if you even want to continue what you are doing, there are the quarter life crisis moments lingering at the back of your head, whispering fuck up thoughts telling you to quit and  move on, to a greener pasture perhaps? or maybe a job that will tell you that you are worth it and that you are important. You know, a girl gotta have her spare coins to waste, but in my case, i dont have any, i have bee...
Post a Comment
Read more

The enforceable truth of a succumbing bastard

well, lemme see… a few days ago i have encountered an online bullying experience of my own, care of by a cum sucking dick face indian, yeah sorry if i said that in a very wrong tone (no racism intended..i love indian people except him), but yeah im so pissed off right now…i cant seem to erase the fact that a super arrogant two face bitch who tweeted me and ask me a favor to get a brain can go to hell now…well who the hell is he in the first place...he said not so good things about me, which is obviously in a very hating tone ..well i forgive maybe him... it is his lack of sex, love life and social life that unforeseeably lead him to be hater of sorts, which only made him feel very superior to all people around him..i just dont like the way he talks to people and all he does is contradict every argument or rants they have, how dare he be like that when in the first place he is not from here, he should have been more leaner to us who are native ...
1 comment
Read more

3 Things i realised after watching "The Intern"

Have you ever felt something within you while watching a movie? well for me, i always do. So just 5 minutes ago, i just finished watching Anne Hathaway and Robert De Niro in their 2015 movie "The Intern", and it turns out that it is a flick full of inspiration stuck within its plot.  So Here are the 3 Things i realised after watching "The Intern" 1. Remember to Breathe and never forget to take it all in one step at a time. As a newbie in my field, i have always been told that working in that agency is never a "walk in the park", and since i was definitely being told to act as a pro-bee and take what our boss gives, i always assumed that the more work i get or the more projects assigned to me - the better. But what i truly realised is that taking on a lot of things on my plate without even asking myself if i can handle it alone is truly bad. There are probably lots of times, in which i ask myself 2 same exact question every time i am exhausted: 1...
Post a Comment
Read more